A Shameful Apology & Fallout Shelter

First of all, I’m sorry that there wasn’t a post yesterday. In all honesty, the last couple of weeks have been all about Dark Souls 3. If I’m not playing it (and dying), I’m watching speedruns or PvP videos on YouTube. Or I might be laughing at Luke’s misfortune. It only occurred to me this morning that I’d completely forgotten about this week’s post.

On that note, let me tell you about the time I was an Overseer of Vault 123.


Before I had stumbled into the wasteland of the Commonwealth, I was safely tucked away in the ground. By that I mean I was hunched over my phone, at my desk, pawing at a screen of little cartoon men and women I’d locked in a vault.

Fallout Shelter is Bethesda’s attempt at a mobile game, set in the Fallout universe (obviously) where you are the Overseer and you get to perform the terrible experiments (spoiler alert: you actually don’t). It’s quite a cutesy game, with a cartoony artstyle like the above image all throughout. As Overseer, you must micromanage everything about your vault, ensuring you have enough dwellers, that there is enough power, food and water to keep them all alive and stockpiling enough weapons to ensure you can mastermind Apocalypse 2.0.

The game can be a bit obnoxious at the start, with constant notifications to pick up a batch of food or water or power, with barely enough time to lock your screen before it’s ready again. As you build and expand your power stations, diners and water treatment systems, you’ll get more time to rest between.

Once you’ve managed to pack some dwellers in, you’ll unlock new rooms to build, so you can send your vault sprawling below the surface (as long as it’s 3 rooms wide, with 2 elevators) – but these will end up being rooms that level different skills. With a power station in the middle. I’m sure there are guides out there that will direct you to building the most efficient sub-city, where no skill is wasted and no man is free.

You can also throw your little dwellers into the harsh light of a dying world to scavenge for you. The most you’ll see of their adventures, probably in search of their lost son or something, is a scrolling text screen which will detail a fight in a manner Michael Bay would be envious of: “Oh no, a Radscorpion! I defeated it for 3xp”.

You’re not the only one exploring the wastes, though. Roving bands of Raiders or Deathclaws can – and will – pop by to test the defensive capabilities of your vault. So make sure everyone is tooled up and dressed appropriately, because they will burst through the vault door and methodically march through your vault causing havoc and stealing resources.

It’s a fun little game, but I got bored of it a little quickly. It didn’t help that I decided to uninstall it before one of the early patches, in the days before Cloud Saves. Once the timers extend beyond 5 minutes, it’s not much more than a game about watching cartoon men doing push-ups until a Raider party charges through your Diner and steals a cupcake…

Update: I reinstalled Fallout Shelter today (11/05/2016) to see if anything had changed and to my surprise something had! There are, I assume, 2 new rooms for crafting weapons and armour. Now you can hoard pointless junk on your phone as well as on your console! Nothing major, just thought I should mention it.


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